When things go wrong.

Disclaimer: I had to re-write this post because I did not want to involve any people that may be offended in any way. 

I only have two days 'til my maternity leave and I wanted everything to be in place, so I've been rushing to finish all my work before I go on leave for two months. But unfortunately, things seemed not to be going my way. Instead of finishing all my work on time, it turned out that I had to extend and re-arrange my timelines because of additional workload and as much as I want to finish all tasks at once, I can't, because I'm no wonder woman. 

The past few weeks have not been easy. I've had long and stressful days at work and last Thursday was by far the worst day of my life ever. I felt really tired and I just wanted to get out of the office and never come back. I knew that I was not supposed to feel this, knowing my condition and believe me, I tried everything to remove my mind from stress but I failed. 

I was in the verge of breaking down but I had to keep my composure because I did not want to make a scene and I did not want my colleagues to see that I was not okay. So I decided to call my husband instead because I knew that he can bring some sense into my head. As always, he did not fail me. I felt a bit better after our conversation. 

We attended mass at St. Pio Center after work and for the first time in the past chaotic weeks in the office, I felt peace. As the priest read on the gospel, it immediately struck me: 

It struck me because with all of what I experienced that day, it felt like the words were meant for me. Matthew 11: 28-30 was the complete description of what I felt and needed at that very moment. 

The priest gave a very short and simple sermon, he just said that: 

If time comes that we become tired and exhausted, all we need to do is just accept God's invitation to follow him and that if we trust and offer everything to him, he promises to find rest and refreshment for our souls.

He said that we don't need to carry all our baggages on our own. We should never try to drag it, carry it on one shoulder, instead, we should embrace it. Like what Jesus did when he carried the cross. Each one of us has our own crosses to carry and he did not promise that if we embrace it, things will be easier but he can assure us that he will be on our sides, to help us carry it. 

Upon hearing these words, I felt relieved and I couldn't help but cry. Maybe it was also brought by my buntis hormones (pregnancy hormones) HAHA, but I was really emotional. It truly touched my heart because despite the long day, I knew that God found time to speak to me. I realized that despite all the troubles that I've been feeling for the past weeks, he has always been watching over me and this was the time for me to breathe and take a rest. I was reminded that no matter how difficult our day to day encounters may be, when things go wrong, he will always find a way to make things better.

It may be the worst day of my life but it was also one of those days that I would always be grateful for, because I was reminded that I am never alone in my daily battles. 

xx